How to Politely Tell Him No

I swear sometimes men can be so pushy that I end up sounding rude when I have to forcefully say I’m not interested. Here’s a perfect example: Last week my sister’s weird boyfriend, C, invited me to a seance he was holding at his apartment. I mean let’s be honest, this is a guy who brought a bag of raw meat to my last dinner party and never contributes to the conversation- who would want to attend ANYTHING with him??

I wanted to tell him some really rude things before turning it down, but I was afraid he would snitch to my sister like he usually does. I realized at that moment that there are a series of ways to say no without hurting anyone’s feelings- and I’m here today to share them all with you! Without further ado here are my 5 favorite ways to kindly say no:

1. Sorry I’m attending another seance the same night as yours. 

This always works wonders for me because people don’t love prying into such personal matters as death. I’ve used this one a multitude of times without hurting the askers feelings. Then I get to spend the entire night in my apartment watching old reruns of Flip or Flop and eating banana yogurt with mayonnaise (I play it safe- I would hate to go out and accidentally run into the person who invited me and then have to explain why I’m not at a seance).

2. My sister is in the hospital and I have to visit her. 

This is SUCH a good excuse- but only use it if the person you’re turning down isn’t dating your sister. I can tell you from personal experience it is SOOO awkward to have to rush all the way to the hospital with someone and then lie and say your sister must have miraculously recovered since you can’t find her in any of the operation rooms (also I got banned from a hospital for interrupting 18 surgeries for this very reason, so embarrassing).

3. I’m sorry but that goes against my political views. 

This one may seem obvious, but it works. People hate talking about politics! Chances are the asker will just leave it at that.

4. I’m sorry but I’m on a diet.

Again a little obvious, but it does the trick. I’ve used this so many times before and no one has ever pushed me to attend. Everyone knows a girl on a diet is not the type of person you want raising the dead with you. Talk about drama!

5. Just a simple ‘No Thanks’ 

Use thank you or thanks is such a nice way to turn someone down. It shows that you are polite and that you respect them for asking (even if you don’t!). I throw ‘thanks’ in all the time when I’m speaking with people because I’ve found that they are more willing to give me free things or read my blog.

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14 Comments

  • Reply
    Nina
    May 22, 2017 at 12:33 pm

    These are such good excuses, I am always looking for nice ways to get out of things- thanks for these!

  • Reply
    Lindsey Hush
    May 22, 2017 at 12:35 pm

    Honestly I use the I’m on a Diet excuse ALL THE TIME. It never fails me, it’s just so perfect!

    xx
    Lindsey @Hushpupfashionistabrand

  • Reply
    Noelle
    May 22, 2017 at 12:37 pm

    I don’t have a sister so I’ll definitely have to change #2- could I say dog instead?

    Thanks,
    Noelle

    • Reply
      Phyllis
      May 23, 2017 at 7:10 am

      Absolutely!

  • Reply
    Keyla
    May 22, 2017 at 1:36 pm

    This is helpful! Two questions for you,though!
    1. I know the post focuses on using these excuses for men, but will it work with women too? I have a few friends who have invited me to seances and they’re women. I am not interested, regardless of whether a man or woman is hosting, so will the excuses work the same way?
    2. If one excuse doesn’t work, should I just automatically move to the next excuse?

    • Reply
      Phyllis
      May 23, 2017 at 7:10 am

      Hi Keyla, thanks for the great question! These excuses will not work with women- we might do a post focusing on that later just because it’s so gender specific. And yes, if one excuse doesn’t work I would go down one number from what you started with and use that next (if you started with 1 just use 1 again).

  • Reply
    Cindy Elena
    May 22, 2017 at 4:32 pm

    Ugh I swear telling a man no is so hard! They can’t comprehend the fact that you are not interested!

    xo | Cindy Elena
    http://www.boringclothes.com

    • Reply
      Phyllis
      May 23, 2017 at 7:10 am

      Preach sister!

  • Reply
    Keri
    May 22, 2017 at 4:37 pm

    LOL this is hilarious. Loving these excuses haha

    Enclothed Cognition

    • Reply
      Phyllis
      May 23, 2017 at 7:11 am

      Thanks Keri, keep checking in for more good advice!

  • Reply
    Laura Mitbrodt
    May 22, 2017 at 9:29 pm

    haha this is funny, I find it easier through text but it is so hard when you are put on the spot in person
    xo
    http://www.laurajaneatelier.com

    • Reply
      Phyllis
      May 23, 2017 at 7:18 am

      Thanks for reading, Laura! I totally agree, texting is the easiest (unless you’re trying to avoid having any proof of the convo!!!)

  • Reply
    Magda
    May 23, 2017 at 7:31 am

    Great post 🙂

    http://www.gloryofthesnow.com

  • Reply
    Tiffany Lea Zimmermann
    May 24, 2017 at 6:56 am

    this post is hilarious!!
    Xx, TL
    https://zimmylifestyle.com

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